The Fool
by Color Me Tardis
Summary: I'm the fool in love with the fool, who's still in love with you.'


You don't know me but I know who you are

Mind if I sit down

Do I look familiar if I don't well I should

I'm sure you've seen me around

I know you've probably heard my name

Though we've not been introduced

I'm the fool in love with the fool

Who's still in love with you

If you've got a minute I'll buy you a drink

I've got something to say

It might sound crazy but last night in his sleep

I heard him call out your name

This ain't the first time he's done it before

And it's hard to face the truth

I'm the fool in love with the fool

Who's still in love with you

I know love is a fragile thing

And I'm trying hard to make it last

But it ain't easy holding on to my dream

When he's holding on to the past

Just one more thing before I go

I'm not here to put you down

You don't love him and that's a fact

Girl I've seen you around

But you hold his heart in the palm of your hand

And it's breaking mine in two

'Cause I'm the fool in love with the fool

Who's still in love with you

I'm the fool in love with the fool

Who's still in love with you

The past was the past but you never forget anything from the past. Your first love, your first kiss, first slow dance. You never forget when your parents die or if you lose a friend to a car crash or if your pet dies. You'll never forget your first friend, first teacher you actually like or your wedding. You won't forget your first high paying job or all the things that happened through it.

So now you wonder how he expects you to forget that you love him. How does he expect you to forget how long it took you two to admit you loved each other? How does he expect you to forget how you guys were gonna get pregnant? He just wants to leave town and you want him to stay but he just won't.

So now you're at the bar and some woman is singing something by Lee Ann Womack but it sounds so far away that you can't pick up the words. You just don't know what to do other than drown your sorrows in a glass of scotch. It's your third scotch and you have a sort of fuzzy eyesight now but it isn't too bad.

It's been three months since he quit but you're still crying about him. You never show it at work or in public but every time you go home you cry. It's only a little but it's enough to remind you that he was once there and it wasn't a dream. Now you're at the bar and a woman is walking over but you know it's not because of you. The bartender is near so the woman must be asking for a drink.

"Rum…" She says and you like her voice. It's slow and steady with confidence but as you look over you notice her eyes are slightly hazy. The confidence is from the alcohol and you look around for anyone she might be with before the woman sits next to you. She glances at you for a second before she smiles at the bartender as he hands her the drink she's requested.

You finish your drink and are about to flag down the bartender when the woman flags him down first. You glance at her rum and notice it's all still there and no one has arrived. You wonder what's the problem that she would need to call the bartender.

"I'll buy you another." She says, leaning towards you. You are silent from the shock as she asks for a scotch. The man looks uncomfortable before preparing one and handing it to you. You nod to him and then look back at the woman.

"Thanks." You whisper, your voice cracking a bit. You stare at the amber liquid in the glass. It's your best friend now a days and that makes you upset. Work hasn't been going all that well for you and you know that if you keep going down this path you'll fall in a ditch and you'll find yourself without a job. You keep telling yourself that tomorrow you'll clean up your act but like every other human being, tomorrow never comes.

"I came here to talk to you." The woman said, concern now on her face when you look over. You don't know if you should tell her to leave you alone or if you should beg her to help you. You don't know this woman though so you keep your mouth shut until she talks some more. "We have something in common, in a way."

"Who are you?" You find yourself asking, unable to control yourself. What do you have to lose by talking to this woman?

"You don't know me. You might have heard of me. My name's Lina." You stare at her and go slightly paler than you were merely seconds before.

"You're the other woman." You whisper, shaking your head a bit. You know why he's picked her. He has an eye for the prettier woman, some who actually have a personality. She's definitely intelligent. You like her hair, it reminds you of your own hair, curly and chocolate brown. She has light green eyes that won't stop looking you over. You can tell she sees why he's picked you.

You used to think that he picked the woman for just the sex or the want for another life but you now know that he picks them out for their looks, personality and their emotional status. They're always almost perfect, with one or two flaws that makes them even better and in a way that makes you love him more.

He doesn't just pick them out of bars, he finds them after long searches, and he shows them the life they want. He's a good man and you know he can't love just one woman. This woman, Lina, she'll get her heart broken soon enough and you think that maybe she's already had it broken, you just aren't sure.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that." You have never met the other woman in his life but this one is different. She's come here for a reason so you decide to hear her out she looks guilty enough anyways.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" You ask, sipping the scotch before looking at her again. She's nodding as if trying to remember why she's there at all.

"Look, he still loves you. Last night, he called out your name in his sleep. When we have sex, he calls out your name and not mine. I don't correct him because I know he's fantasizing about you. He won't let his past leave him." She watches as you look away from her and stare at your drink again. "He does it a lot, all the time and I don't want to admit to myself that he's still in love with you but he is."

You slowly nod and blink to keep the tears from falling. "Cry, Lisa, cry." She whispers and puts her arm around your shoulder as you cry in public. You lean into her and forget that she's the other woman, the reason he left in the first place. You should be angry at her but you find that you can't say anything. The tears are falling too hard and she's too nice to cause all of this trouble.

"I want you to be back with him again. I want him to have his job back but he doesn't know I'm talking to you. Can I drive you to our house? You can talk to him?" You stare at her blankly, unsure of what to say. You'd like to talk to him again but last time you did it was a big fight and you guys haven't spoken since.

"Uhm, I can't." You whisper, pulling from her arms as you clean up your tears. You still wanna cry but you can't bring yourself to lower to levels of crying into the 'other womans' arms.

"Please?" You can tell that she's trying to figure out if you love him as much as she thinks. You suddenly shake your head 'no' and begin to stand.

"Lead me to your car." You say, wanting to talk to him now. You need to see him now that you've heard that you have a chance to see his brown eyes, his soft hair. You used to run your fingers through his hair all the time. It makes you want to cry, that memory.

Soon you're at their house and you realize that she's not only beautiful and smart but she definitely isn't poor. She's got good taste, much like you. It's a brick two floor house full with a chimney, large front yard and probably an even bigger back yard. She leads you to the front door, both of you are wearing heels and they click clack against the cobblestone walk.

She leads you down the hall after easily opening the wooden door. The inside had painting and a dim glow bouncing against the tanned walls from the golden wall lights. You like the house, how it reminds you of your own. She leads you into the living room where he's sitting. You're silent though you so desperately want to speak. Seeing him in the light makes you want to cry but you're absolutely silent. He doesn't notice either of you for he's too into the book he's reading. It takes you a moment to realize it's not a book but a scrapbook. You can just see a bit of your face on one of the pictures.

"James?" The woman whispers, you've already forgotten her name.

"Hey, Lina." He says, without looking up, and closes the scrapbook. As he stands, he looks up and spots you but he's silent, like he's not sure if it's you or not.

"I found Lisa at the bar. I brought her over, I think you guys might want to talk." You can tell he's quite upset that she went behind his back to find his ex lover but he quickly gets over it as he registers that it is in fact you.

"You said you were at your mothers house for a quick visit." He said, finally looking from you to his girlfriend.

"Yeah, well, everybody lies." She had met House, you can tell, and she's picked up some of his talents and sayings. That's the last you see of her for the rest of the night because she leaves you two alone in the living room and only does James speak when he hears the front door close and the car start up. He doesn't know where she's going but he wants to be alone with you.

There are no words in your conversation, it's blue on brown as you stare at each other and suddenly you are both in an embrace. You're crying and soon he's holding you on the couch. He's wanted to see you for so long that if you're crying, that's ok 'cause he wants to hold you. He hasn't seen you in so long it makes him almost angry with himself.

"I've missed you so much." You cry into his shoulder and he's rubbing your back in an attempt to calm you down. You can tell he doesn't want you to move away from him so you don't.

"You could have visited." You whispered, closing your eyes. When you open them it's because you are having these urges you don't want to have. You wish you can let the past go but you can't and he can't.

"No. I couldn't have." He knows you couldn't have done it but he's been wishing you could have and you can see it in his face when you pull back a bit to look at him. Your faces are inches apart and suddenly it's lips on lips in a hesitant kiss, followed by a more needy one and then a desperate one. You don't want to lose him again but soon you guys are driving back to your house and you aren't sure what he's going to do. Is he going to drop you off?

When he parks, he shuts the car off and looks at you through the darkness. You are staring at your house through the window and when you look at him he can tell that you want him to enter with you.

You lead him up the steps and into the house. It's dark and smells almost dusty since you haven't been there in days. You turn on the light and lead him to the living room. It's warm in the house and the both of you have shed your coats and shoes. He feels at home here, you can tell and soon you're both on the couch in each other's arms, kissing every now and then. It's so nice that you're scared you'll wake up from a dream.

You fall asleep in his arms and when you wake up he is still holding you. You open your eyes slowly and move around a bit to look at him. He smiles, having been up for a half an hour now. He wanted to listen as you slept and he wanted to feel your body heat. He loves yu so much and can't believe he let you go.

"I love you." He whispers but you don't say anything, instead you kiss him softly. He shakes his head slowly and you smile, knowing he wanted more than a kiss.

"I love you too." You whisper, finally getting to say that to him again.

He has to deal with Lina, you know she'll be sad but she wants you to be happy and mostly she wants him to be happy. Soon you'll be living together again like it's all better, you wish.

He doesn't go home to deal with Lina, actually he lies to her and every now and then he comes to see you, sleeps with you, says he loves you. You stay with him and get back on track with your work life. Everything's ok.

Except now, you're the other woman and that's something you never wanted to be.

Now you're the fool.


End file.
